LOLCATS!!1! A Tutorial

Everyone loves LolCats and we’re no exception. Dreaming of creating your own LolCats but you’re not sure how? Don’t have the time, or the cats? No problem. We have found the solution. No more fretting about captions and how to correctly misspell. No longer will you be forced to spend your evenings searching the neighborhood for stray cat models. No more tricking your model into cleverly posing in front of your computer. And no more invisible bike scratch-fests. With the the help of the Layercake LolCat Tutorial and some technical support from LolCat Builder and Kitten Generator you’re free to build LolCats on the fly. You will be the ruler of LolCats.

Before you build your first LolCat you’ll need some grammar guidelines.

Step 1 Review Anil Dash’s helpful tips for writing LolCat captions:

An excerpt:

• I’M IN UR X Ying your Z. This construct, based on i’m in ur base, killin ur d00ds has morphed into a catch-all structure for annotating cat pictures.

• Invisible Item. Variations on the seminal Invisible Bike, these are images of cats, usually in midair, with captions that prompt us to fill in imaginary objects or actions that complete the scene. There’s something brilliant to these images, speaking to our mind’s ability to intuitively extrapolate unseen details.

• Kitty Pidgin. And finally, the newly dominant lolcats, of the family I Can Has Cheezeburger? These seem to be spawning nearly infinite variations, and have exploded in popularity since being named “lolcats” instead of the more general “image macro” or “cat macro”.

Step 2: Hire a kitten model or get free Kitten photos at Kittenwar’s Random Kitten Generator!

Step 3 Using your kitten model and your lolcat caption skills create a funny caption. We have created some dos and don’ts to as guidelines. We were unable to obtain releases from our models so taking a cue from Glamour magazine we have taken measures to protect the privacy of our models.

LolCats Grammar: A Visual Guideline

Alternate subject matter:

Use alternate subject matter where appropriate. Hamsters are commonly substituted as are political figures and celebrities. Use caution when determining what is LOLable.

Here is our visual guideline for alternate LolCats subject matter:

Step 4: Generating your LOL________

Using the LolCat Buildr you can combine all of your new skillz into an amazing and hilarious LolCat that is sure to get some DIGG lovin’ when you post it on your shiny happy blog. Simply upload your kitten model, select your text style and placement and type in your caption. We’re laughing already! No really, you’re pretty funny.

For more inspiration go here or here to see more. And don’t miss the genius of LolBats at Apropos of Something or the fabulous LolBush at My Alter Ego Speaks.

Happy LOLing!

Share This

This is a weekend of theatrical redemption. After last week’s Pirates of the three-hours-of-life-stealing Caribbean, we are still a little gun shy, but willing to return to the theater with an open mind. The most exciting thing about this weekend’s openers is that none of them have III in the title. Admittedly none of the this weekends big bang openings are Oscar contenders but there is fun to be had and of course, popcorn.

If we had to pick just one, we would choose: Knocked Up

Popcorn Worthy: Yes! Yes! Yes!

Why: Almost the entire cast from the 40 Year Old Virgin is together again in this tale about a one night stand that turns into and baby makes three. We’d watch Seth Rogen in anything, he stole every scene in 40 Year Old Virgin and we’re so excited to see him again. He’s got that nerdy video game player hotness thing that we adore. Love him! Knocked up was written and directed by Judd Apatow from the 40 Year Old Virgin writing team. Yes, please!

Trailer:

Get tickets to see Knocked Up here.

Share This

Good morning and welcome to the day! Here’s the thing, we have finals this week. So, in order to make the study time we invite you to take a trip down Memory Layercake. Here are a few posts you may have overlooked in the flurry of Lohan drunk drama and blank is the new blank posts.

In honor of the dangling carrot that is Summer Vacation , we’ve set the dial on the Layercake Wayback Machine to: Summer 2005

Signs that it’s time to get a job. No, really. It’s time. May 27th, 2005

He did a bad, bad thing. June 25, 2005

Monogamy: Highly overrated. July 13, 20005

Alice Cooper-School’s Out For Summer (Where Summer equals the four weeks before Summer school begins)

Off to study, see you soon…

Share This

Two things suck about this week:

1) We’re not in Canada

2) We don’t have tickets to the sold out Police tour

In fact we are ticketless for the entire tour. This is quite frankly, an outrage. Favorite. Band. Ever. That’s all we’re going to say about it.

Sting shows the crowd his tantric O face

Stewart Copeland, love his smile in this pic.

Walking in Your Footsteps in Vancouver, BC Monday night.

Seriously great footage from the Whiskey a Go Go show in February, where they officially announced the reunion tour.

Take the Scalper’s Delight poll:

 Loading ...

Share This

Ahoy Pirates and Wenches! On this day in honor of Pirates of the Carribean 3, we be postin’ all things Pirate.! Arrrr! If ye be visitin’ the Pirate’s Chest of Cake on many occasions this day, yer pirate eyes will feast upon many pearls of Pirate Pop Culture.

Now on to the Popcorn Friday lest ye matees not know what movie to be seein’ on this adventurous and treasure filled weekend..Arr..

Popcorn Worthy: Arrrghh.

Why: Even pirate fans fear the wrath of world’s end. We be makin’ our treasures safe by purchasing a ticket.

Watch the trailer: or suffer the wrath..

Lay yer eyes on the Layercake English to Pirate Translator and be ye prepared to leave yer comments in pirate speak!

Be visitin’ us again today or ye be walkin’ tha plank.. arrrr

Share This

This one is for our reader and dear friend Angela. No Brad, just Ang. If you can stomach Anne Curry, it’s a good interview. We originally saw it on tv and it’s so much better this way, without the eleventymillion interruptions. She is so real. Very introspective and it’s sad to hear her talk about losing her mom.

Sheryl Crow and her new baby, Wyatt. He’s pretty cute. So happy for her.

Meanwhile, Lance Armstrong continues his collecting of relationships with blonds with clothing designer Tory Burch. Nah, he doesn’t have a type.

Share This

It’s Popcorn Friday!

Is it even worth mentioning that there are other movies opening this weekend that don’t star a green ogre? While it’s true that Shrek is the only big box office movie opening, there are a couple of other gems out that are totally worthy of the popcorn.

So let’s get this out of the way:

Popcorn Worthy: Shrek

Why: Because feeling left out makes us cry. We also have a soft spot for Shrek’s babies, Shilo, Pax and Maddox.

Popcorn Worthy: Brooklyn Rules

Why: The mafia and college go together like cake and ice cream. Also hearing Alec Baldwin lose his temper makes us all warm and fuzzy.

Watch the trailah :

Popcorn Worthy: Even Money

Why: Alec Baldwin and Kim Bassinger both have movies opening this weekend. Oh now it’s war. You thought the whole child custody thing was ugly. It’s so onnnnnnnnnnnnnn (drag out the n, you know the drill). This film stars Kim Bassinger (ew) and Danny Devito and the plot sounds a little like the Prestige meets Two For the Money meets When a Man Loves a Woman. Even Money also stars Forest Whitaker who cancels out the Kim Bassinger ew-factor which means that by default we will be there.

Watch the trailer:

Uber-Popcorn Worthy: The Wendell Baker Story

Why: We will probably see this twice and then buy the DVD and then spend the rest of our lives blissfully quoting the dialog.

Watch the trailer: loldogs: Run, Jr., run for your life.

The Bad boy Wilson brother:

The thinking woman’s Wilson brother

Share This

Here are a few of the cinematic delights and disappointments for Friday May 11:

Popcorn Worthy : The Ex

Why: Just watch the trailer. We cried from laughing.

Trailer:

Semi-Popcorn Worthy (if it’s raining and we lose internet connection): Georgia Rule

Why: We’re not huge fans of the Blohan but we adore Felicity Huffman. Are you seeing it?

Trailer:

Definitely waiting for the DVD : 28 More Days Minutes Ago Months From Now Weeks later

But here’s the thing, we don’t watch scary movies unless there is a cartoon chaser involved. So, 28 Weeks Later is off the list until we can watch it on the couch and follow up with the Sponge Bob Scary Movie Eraser episode before bed. Uh yeah, too scared to even put the poster on here. So we’ll just post this tiny much less scary link.

Share This

Bust out your suspenders, Gordon Gecko is back! WSJ reports Michael Douglas will revive the role in the sequel to Wall Street. The working title is Money Never Sleeps. Studio execs say that the role of Bud Fox played by Charlie Sheen won’t return. Uh yeah, the only way Bud Fox could return would be if he wanted to die. Gecko would be out for blood! NYT

And now, we present Gordon Gecko’s Shopping List:

$40 Water BlingH20

$1,000 Ice Cream Sundae. Luxist

$250k Handbag for Darian. Lana Marks

$8,000,000 car. Mercedes Maybach

$138,000,000 Zillionaire home, sweet zillionaire home.

The original trailer for Wall Street. Damn, it still looks good. Watch for the GIGANTIC cell phone circa 1987!

Share This

Lindsay blows it. Defamer

Oprah Winfrey Barack’s back. Does that come with a Book Club membership? New York Times

Britney Murphy marries some guy you’ve never heard of. Us 

The verdict is in. Paris, no Free for you. Get the Don’t Free Paris t-shirt. Gawker

Best. Coffee. Mug. Ever. Goes really well with crumb cake. The Onion

Share This